Deceased Flowers

My piece titled, “Deceased Flowers” is 14 x 17 inches and made from charcoal and pastels on heavy-weight paper. This piece is an illustration of a woman who is gently holding a man’s head close to her as his head is facing straight down in a depressing manner. The woman in this piece is Hispanic with pale skin and red undertones. She has short dark brown hair that appears almost black and rests just below her ear that is pierced with a gold hoop earring, she is also wearing a black T-shirt that compliments her hair and the black background. This piece showcases the woman’s side profile but her head is in a 3/4ths position with her gaze facing towards the audience. In the center of her forehead, just above her eyes, are light blue flower peddles blooming from the hole that is in her head. The flower peddles act as a part of her flesh and disguises itself as the tissue beneath the skin as they are stained in blood. The man that she is holding is black with red undertones and has long hair that is styled in cornrows. He as a similar hole just like the woman in front of him, but his is placed in the back of his head and is much larger. Red flower peddles bloom in contrast to the blue flower peddles. However, there is far more blood gushing out from the man which indicates that the wound is still fresh.

I was inspired to make this piece because the concept of love was weighing heavy on my heart. I made this piece because I believe that this idea of relationships and marriage might truly be dead. Despite this, I am still motivated to continue loving as genuine as I possibly can even if I do not receive the same from others. The flowers within this piece represents the love that people possess but the head wounds showcase the pain and trauma that people have faced while in the pursuit of love. The man is lifeless and gives no signs of being alive; that represents my desire to be loved. I used to crave the love that I give out to others because it gave me a sense of purpose. It made me feel like I deserved to be here on this earth and that my existence wasn’t just some mistake. The woman is nurturing him by inviting her into her arms, and this showcases the unyielding love that I will continue to give out despite being hurt and perhaps being unhealed myself. I will continue to love but never seek to be in a committed relationship as attachment is the root of all suffering. I don’t bear any hatred or even feel disappointed by this as all. I feel free because a flower isn’t beautiful because it lasts; everything must come to an end at some point because part of the journey is the end and I must accept it.

While I was working on this piece, I came to the realization that I make a lot of art based on my love life and this is also something I would like to put an end. With my ability to tell stories and spark conversations on serious subject matters through my art, I should put more focus on subjects that need more attention. There’s a lot going on in the world right now, and while my art may not make that much of a difference, I believe that my work has the ability to inspire the minds that can/will make a difference. God has put it on my heart to do two things; to illustrate the light and the darkness of people, to showcase the good and the bad that words simply cannot do. I would like to shift the kind of art that I make to talk about something that truly matters. My goal is to get my audience to question themselves and to get them to reflect on their morals as well as the way we live our lives.

I’m emotionally attached to this piece for numerous of reasons but especially because this piece features the same woman that can be found in my piece titled, “Her Own Firmament”. She is featured in this piece because she is the last woman who I truly wanted to be in a relationship with. I did everything that I could to pursue her and it’s because I know that I did my best that I can feel at peace with giving up and retiring from the desires of my heart. Looking at this piece will remind me to stay off the path that is not meant for me, and It’ll remind me that the old things have passed away and that new things have come into existence.

I believe that I have taken another step forward with this piece as I am aiming to incorporate people of different ethnicities into my work in order to make more of my audience feel represented in the work that I create. I have exclusively made art with black people because I wanted my community to be represented in art as we have been excluded for many years in the past. However, the message behind my work is far too big and important to just be seen by African Americans. I feel like it would be selfish of me to exclude other races as I’m trying to make a difference in the world, not just in my own community. I want to take this opportunity to explore and learn different cultures and incorporate them in my work. I would also like to learn about the art styles of different artists of other ethnicities in order to improve my work. As I’ve been studying the old masters like Michelangelo, Caravaggio, Bosch, and Vermeer; I would also like to improve my work in other areas so that my creativity can become free. Plus, black art has reached an all time high in recent years and will only continue to become more relevant and popular as time goes on. I’ve met and seen so many great artists that I look up to and see as rivals. I won’t ever have to worry about if my people are being represented in the art world because of this.

This piece has become a special love of mine as it only inspires me to follow my path and put and end to the old things while new things have come into existence. “Deceased Flowers”, Is a beautiful piece indeed.